1. Be French
2. Have the face of an angel
4. Have killer grades
5. Invite her to share in your interests/cults
6. Steal the wine
7. Drink the wine
8. Take her to dinner
9. Bite your lip
10. Concisely deconstruct the limiting effects of a heteronormative society on your sexuality
11. Lick her face
12. Make totally crazy science.
Cosima agrees. This proved to be a highly effective method of monitor seduction.